i might give up my dogs?
Posted: April 16th, 2011 | Author: admin | Filed under: Common Questions | Tags: Dogs, Give, might | 5 Comments »i’m in tears but i think it mightbe the best decision. my dog who has had anxiety since march, ran away from the yard today. i let her out for a minute like i do every day at this time so she can go tio the bathroom and she moved through the tile i had blocked off the deck and got out right in front of me, i couldnt get there in time to catch her she was under. i looked all over for her finally i got a call someone took her in. when i got there, the woman who took her was very kind. i told her about my dogs anxiety, and the woman said, she was fine with her annd her toy poodle. she said she was the swweestest dog and didn’t shake in fear or show anxiety at all. the woman said if she didnt have a tag she’d havekept my dog and said if i didnt want her shed take her, of course i want my dog, but then i was thinking wellall my dog does is hide every day all day long, maybe it’s me or this house and so habitual now that my dog can never relax here. but my other dog needs her, he loves her, so i’d have to give him up too, this woman who found my dog is very wealthy and said if i ever needed anything to call her.and as i waswlaking my dog back home, i was thinking maybe she’ll be happier with someone else.i’m so sorry i failed her, i’m so sorry. i am so guilty it is my fault, not some stupid vaccinosis thats jsut was a guess by the vet and other people. im terribke and awful i never should have gotten another dog after my other one died of old age. evryone on another group i joiend for help a dog behavior group said it was me who made her like this. i did all the training they said but shes not getting better. sometimes we have good moments on our walks, but theyre getting fewer and farther between. shes never happy with anything anymore. but she might be happy with a new home. im going to ask this woman to take both my dogs.i’ll give her money,i am so sorry i failed her. i dont think theres one thing in life i could ever regret more.
if theres anything i have left to try though i wanted to ask now. in case theresany hope. but if its me nothing will work anyway. so what i tried has been classical conditioning, desensitization, homeopathy, herbs, calming cap, anxiety wrap, crate, and i dont know. i exercise the dogs over 2 hours a day, they are TDI certified,they have had agility and obedience and i teach them dance and frisbee.
it is me though. my mom can get her out of hiding, but when i call her she just shakes more. i never hit or been mean to my dogs ever, yet she acts like i abused her. i dont coddle her when shes scared, i try to ignore it most of the time. anyway if anyone can think of something else, please tell me because if not i know its best to give them away.
it sounds like it might be you. Or just some sort of anxiety that you protray to the dog. I think I would let the other woman have her if she seemed happy there. I mean the dog doesn’t sound happy with you, but does sound happy with this other person, so let the dog be happy, and spend some time fixing you and then when you are feeling better and have done alot of research maybe think about getting another dog that works better for you. I think some dogs and some people just don’t match.
I know you are feeling very overwhelmed and emotional right now.
Take a breath.
Think things through.
Do what you think is best.
I do not see that you mentioned you have worked with your veterinarian and tried a drug called Clomicalm? This is an oustanding anti-anxiety drug for dogs. I know folks who have used it with tremendous results.
I would strongly urge you to try this before you give up your dogs.
Right now I hear frustration and sadness..and an overwhelming feeling we get when our dogs get lost..I would say not to make a rash decision and think about this for the next few days.I know how it feels that a dog has anxiety as I have 1 out of my 11 that is very shy and scrared.This was’nt because of her vaccinations but I think her genetics.She was adopted at 5 mo’s and was so scared wanted nothing to do with anyone.Four years later she”s better but will never be the outgoing dog as her other playmates.This lady you talk about did’nt have her at her home long enough to analyze your dog.I think by giving the other away would devastate him to be away from you.Maybe also your dog feels your anxiety and works off of you.maybe if you tried to relax more and be more calm and accepting maybe she will come around.They say it takes time if this is what it is but you really need to talk to the experts.I wish you luck and have no hard feelings if this is your choice but please rethink this your quick decision..
ADD…how is your dog with food and walks and going outside.Is she scared or does she go right to the food bowl and eat.Does she enjoy her walks with you?? If you decide about giving this lady your dog why don’t you observe from another room just how your dog is acting..Stick around out of sight and just see if she acts the same.That will tell you whether or not it is you that is causing the anxiety or not..
This is a hard one. Sounds like it is you but it is not your fault, dear. Your energy is not right for this dog. You have put everything you can into her. Why are you feeling so distraught? The dog(s) are going to a good home. The *right* home with the correct energy.
I don’t mean to be pounding on the energy thing but animals feel our emotions. I am very high strung. I carry much anxiety and stress. Thankfully, the animals I have (except for one) are fine with my inner self.
Stop beating yourself up. You are doing what is best for the animals. Which is all that matters.
You know what? If the dog is fine at her house and the woman is willing to take her, let her go.
Dogs have personalities, and they do not act the same way with different people. It might be as simple as her feeling more comfortable with the ladies other dogs, or in a different setting.
You have done your best….maybe this is just not the right dog for you.
I dont see any reason to give up both dogs, if the other one is fine with you, and let go of the guilt….you have done your best, and that is all anyone can do.